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Simmer's Garden » Other Discussions » Off-Topic & Other Discussions » Off-Topic Help » An eBook, maybe?

An eBook, maybe?

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1 An eBook, maybe? on Fri Jan 18, 2013 8:05 pm


Rising Star
Rising Star
Hey guys, I plan on writing an eBook. I haven't written in a long time, so I would really love your feedback on this first chapter.
Please don't hesitate to fix anything, just don't be mean about it Razz
It hasn't got a title yet because I cant think of one that would capture someone's eye, yet be relevant to the story I'm trying to tell.
The audience I'm going for here is young adult/teenagers.

Chapter One
We don’t know what goes on in any one person’s life. No matter how close you are to them. If you watch closely enough, you might catch a glimpse of the person they’re trying to hide.

It’s the first day of school and I’m excited. I don’t mind the work; it’s the people I love. I love to watch people, figure out who they really are when they aren’t with their friends, when they’re not pretending.
It doesn’t matter who I am or what I look like, what matters is the people in my grade. I’m in grade 10, which makes all of us about to turn 15, for those of us who haven’t got birthdays before the school year starts at the end of January.
The people I find most interesting are the group that thinks they own the school, the ‘popular’s’. These are the kids at roll the sleeves of their uniform up, the ones that make their shorts or skirts or dresses shorter. The ones that always have the latest hair style and clothes and school bags and the other group I find interesting are the ones labelled ‘nerds’ or ‘geeks’, most of them leave their sleeves down, and don’t feel the need to shorten their uniforms. They carry backpacks that actually fit everything they need for the day in there.
What I don’t understand about these people is the labels. Who labels these people and when do they get labelled? Is it the first day of kindergarten? Is it the moment they decide to answer the teacher’s question that they get labelled a geek? This year I plan on following a few students. It gets hard to watch more than five at a time; I tried it last year and just got confused.

I’m everywhere and nowhere. I’m not well known in my school and I plan to keep it that way.

I'm not sure if that chapter is finished yet or not, I cant decide. Also, the rest of the chapters will be named after the person, like "chapter 2: Jodie" is the title of my next chapter.


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